Before I can tell the next part of my stories I need to explain a particular phenomenon which has dogged me for as long as I can remember. For many years it was just this weird thing that kept happening, until it eventually became known as “The Magoolie Factor.”
In simplest terms it manifests itself as misfortune which befalls people, places or things after coming into contact with me – or even my thoughts!
Bear with me while I rattle off some examples.
After finishing my signwriting apprenticeship I started up my own business. Before long I had landed a contract doing work for a highly successful building society, the largest in my home town. They were by far my biggest customer, until they went belly-up with debts of over TWO BILLION dollars!
My next major client was the Harold Swan Newspaper (not its real name), which soon led to me picking up work with two other papers.
The majority of my newspaper work was manufacturing signage for milk bars. What’s a milk bar, you ask? They are often called “the corner store” and when I started there were hundreds of them around town and the region.
But with the advent of 7 Eleven stores and petrol stations turning into 24 hour supermarkets the milk bar became a thing of the past.
There are no more than a handful of them around the place now.
Pictured right: Mad About The House recipient Sir David Jason
out front of Arkwright’s corner store, where he played the
character Granville in Open All Hours.
You’re probably thinking how does that have anything to do with me, and how can I think it’s Magoolie Factor? It’s not because you worked on them. Shops like that become obsolete, it’s just progress.
That’s fair enough, and you’re probably right. But keep reading.
I had a couple of short stints playing local Aussie Rules football. One night at training we were doing a drill where two players at a time vied for the ball. I was paired with a club stalwart who’d hardly missed a game. During our drill the football broke his finger and he never played again.
Years later my son Dilbert was doing an assignment on coaching as part of his Physical Education course at university. I emailed a well-known and very successful coach in a nearby Australian Rules Football league explaining Dilbert’s assignment and asking if he’d be able to sit in on the coach’s match day addresses one day.
He responded with an invitation to the next home game, and Dil and I went along.
After the game we were in the change rooms and two of the more senior players introduced themselves and shook my hand. The very next game both those players broke a finger during play and missed the rest of the season.
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In 1992 Julie and I visited the UK and had a look through Windsor Castle.
The next day it went up in flames.
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On the subject of burning buildings; this one had nothing to do with me, but when Notre-Dame cathedral (left) caught fire on Monday, April 15th 2019, Colin Turner emailed me to ask if I was in Paris.
Such is the infamy of The Magoolie Factor!
I replied to Col saying the Catholics in Paris had gotten Easter Monday and Ash Wednesday mixed up!
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And what did I mean when I said “after coming into contact with me – or even my thoughts!”?
On December 24th, 2005 Julie and I were at a couple’s house for dinner. During our conversation later in the evening a comment was made which sparked a quote from the TV show Get Smart.
Knowing that its star Don Adams was in his eighties at the time a thought came to me which I almost said, but decided not to.
I was going to say, “I wouldn’t be surprised if Don Adams dies soon.” But being aware of the dreaded Magoolie Factor I thought what if I say it and then it happens? What if I say it out loud and then he dies? They’ll be saying I killed Maxwell Smart! So I kept my mouth shut.
We went home, and the next morning when I got up I turned the TV on. THE VERY FIRST THING I SAW was a news report on the passing overnight of Don Adams! It made me wonder if he’d expired at the very moment I thought of him dying. (Cue the Twilight Zone theme.)
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For the next example I’ll bring up 2017 again, and the James Silkweaver concert I attended.
During the show James spoke of his dear friend, singer and guitarist Dale Soupladle (not his real name) with whom he’d had a successful songwriter/singer partnership. Sadly Dale was battling Alzheimer’s disease, which was now quite advanced.
It just so happens that I had written a song about Alzheimer’s myself.* (It was the song I had recorded
“properly” prior to my Syd Barrett songumentary.)
After hearing what James Silkweaver had to say about the disease and the effect it had on his friend I thought he’d really like my song. I even imagined him sending it to Dale Soupladle’s family, as the song is written from the point of view of a loved one or carer.
Being in the fortunate position of having James’s postal address I sent the song to him and Daphne on a USB. The Magoolie Factor then struck, and the moment the USB arrived on U.S. soil Dale Soupladle died!
And I also have another example where I sent something to someone in the USA and a person bearing the SAME NAME as the one to whom I’d sent it DIED whilst the parcel was in transit! The Magoolie Factor nailed the wrong guy! (Unfortunately I can’t divulge the details of this one for legal reasons.)
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On September 23rd, 2020 I Googled New Zealand born and raised rock star Max Merritt. He was well known in Australia for his band Max Merritt and the Meteors, and most notably for a song called Slipping Away.
I Googled Max because I wanted to know when it was that he died. It turns out he hadn’t! I was pleased to find that he was still alive, but befuddled because I was sure he had died some years earlier.
I must have had him confused with somebody else.
But guess what? Max died the next day.
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There are more examples I could mention but I think I’ve made my point. Besides, the best/worst/saddest example is still to follow in the next chapter.
And by the way, if you’re reading this and thinking, “I’d better not read any further or something bad might happen to me,” … TOO LATE!
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*The Alzheimer’s song I recorded is called Unfinished Sentences. I sent the song’s YouTube link to Ian Barrett prior to sending him my Syd songumentary. Just in case he was worried that OPEL might be an embarrassing turkey, I wanted to show him that I could write a half-decent song.
Ian found it very touching, and totally understood it, as he had seen a family member suffer with the disease.
*Artist’s impression of John Cavanagh
I also sent it to John Cavanagh, pictured right.*
John had also seen family members succumb to Alzheimer’s.
He said he appreciated the song and described it as “quite elegiac in
tone.”
The most important thing is both Ian and John appear to have escaped The Magoolie Factor, having not only been in contact with me but have listened to Unfinished Sentences and lived to tell the tale.